1. |
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We drove by a vigil for a kid that died too young
it was New Years’ week and in the spirit of we said
we’ll live for the East Lake boy
that crashed his car that night
then I said something dumb
like the Redskins hate the Cowboys
because Kennedy died in Dallas
I used to feel guilt all of the time
now I just feel guilt not feeling guilty enough
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2. |
Great Apes
03:30
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Do you do what you believe in
and believe in what you do?
the only time that I never waste
is time that I’m with you
if I go before you cut the zipper from my shirt
and make a blanket for your girl
and tell her it’s from the store
horizontal at home now
feuding in the store again
riding out some psychotropics
in the shadow of the World Trade
trying hard to understand the culture in my face
back in the shoes of the ghost I was
running fast through the jungle
home like Tim Robbins in Jacob’s Ladder
horizontal at home now
feuding in the store again
you don’t think you do less now
what you do used to mean much more to you
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3. |
Broke On
04:28
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Theodore Roosevelt was on my TV
looking through the window at the Hudson Valley
he said if you don’t stop moving
you will never feel bad
so I hung an envelope on my wall that says ‘P.M.A’
ride your bike through Oldster
driving in your dad’s car
taking candid pictures
where the widows spend their days
at the sweepstake cafes
you’ll hear about the war and know it’s not yours
then dedicate yourself to the stones,
the ones you broke on
you only say ‘no’
that’s how you get your way
you say stupid things to get attention
why would you have a kid
when the city you live in will be under water soon?
at a time when eyes happen to be open
you’ve got to think small
you’ll hear about the war and know it’s not yours
then dedicate yourself to the stones,
the ones you broke on
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4. |
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There’s a big old clock standing above the door
at Smolenski’s funeral home
your babe was a rolling stone
that came to a rest and gathered no moss
covered in soot,
bouncing across another bridge he burned
I’m glad that you’re happy now in Connecticut
we talked the other night
and I could tell you’d had enough of it
but what I really wanted to say
is I love you for the way
you leaned into the changes in your life
you are my hummingbird
if there’s some truth to be known, it’ll be known
in the end we tolerate each others’ lies
my nails keep growing
I get busy and I forget to cut them
I’ve got a dad’s breathFrom cheap beer and cigarettes
but what I really wanted to say
is that I love you for the way
you leaned into the changes in your life
you are mine’
you are the beauty queen now lick your talons clean
you are the beauty queen and you left piss on the seat
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5. |
Battle Of Bedford Falls
05:10
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A physicist and priest were cutting up in a room
when the ghost walked in
and sucked the air out of the room
they said ‘are you friendly? are you foe?
what can you confidently tell us
you even really know?
’he said he got up early and worked all day
came back home and slept his life away
choices dwindled and the daylight dimmed
but he got right up
and lived the nightmare all over again
I haven’t figured it out yet
you assumed a good boy
would just take it on the chin
get right up and do it over again
because you need a good boy
to just take it on the chin
but he said ‘There’s no war that’s left to win’
and on my headstone it should’ve said:
‘had a long life but never had a chance to live’
keep your eyes on your smart phone
while we circle the same drain
good guys with guns
are digging ditches in cap and gown
and American Idols
are engineering the perfect moment
they heard gatekeepers hate cold calls
but I’ve been wrong, I’ve done awful things
and embarrassed myself,
I’ve let my people down But I wanna be good
it’s ok there’s no future for us, I wanna be good
it’s ok that our time is a camera flash in a stadium
where this useless game is played again
and again and again and again
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6. |
Wizard Of Loneliness
02:38
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Good times sneak and fleet
your friends wanna spend some time with you tonight
meet up at a bar where someone knows about your sign
they said when you were born the stars smiled
calm down and put your phone down
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7. |
Albert Ross
04:43
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We hurt each other so much
I still wonder why it never worked
I wasted time I should have been carefree
unload your woe on me
nobody thinks they’ll wither
I thought you didn’t care but I guess you did
a flower bed gave away your hiding space
you saw the doctor so much
he said go and see somebody else
you don’t have to be so far away
if you wanna leave that’ll be alright
I’ll still be out here on my own
I really don’t mind the time alone
I dreamed about you last night
you were sweet but you were sick
you drink your dad’s hangover now
a flower bed gave away your hiding space
I wasted time that should’ve been carefree
my whole life I wished I died bravely
a flower bed gave away your hiding space
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8. |
Nothing To Show
03:23
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Watching ‘When Ghosts Attack’ alone
a Maryland ghost destroys a home
I was impatient for the cold
now it looks like it’s gonna snow
there was nothing to show
I ate an apple in the shade
of a tree that Roosevelt had raised
I took Taconic Parkway
then washed my hands with Hibiclens
there was nothing to show
progress in another town
making plans to brag about
pleading for some tolerance
while you yourself, intolerant
you’ve got nothing to show
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9. |
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I used to bend the will of rivers
and send them flooding into fields
where delicate things grew
I never noticed above dark rain clouds
like bruises in the sky
I kept my eye on the prize
I ground down to the gum milky young teeth at the bit
my whole world was in my room
playing both sides of a Magic game
black vs. green and bootleg Maxell tape of Queen
some wooden animals and lockets of wheat
and a string of garlic hanging from my ceiling
to keep Dracula away
I never saw him anyway
that’s good enough for me
because I’m always wrong before I’m right
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10. |
I Used To Be Small
03:15
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I wake up covered in seeds
when the song ends I’ll laugh nervously
I used to be small
but I could pace a hole through the floor
I’ve got a bad feeling about the world
you’re cultured and cursed
with dated ideas about what it means
to have American Dreams
you’re hanging onto the world that already moved
yes I am embarrassed to be here
I wonder if the next mass shooting will be near
if God tells me to keep the flock safe
I’ll keep a gun loaded
with the safety off just in case
I used to be small
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11. |
They Hate Our Freedom
05:44
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You said ‘calm down honey and sit real still
if it’s that important you don’t have to yell’
when I said ‘calm down honey and sit real still
I can hear in your voice you’re not feeling well’
you said ‘I’m at the beach where
the low flying planes shake the shells beneath my feet’
you woke up suddenly at 5 AM
your mattress on the floor,
you called your brother
screaming about your taxes this year
and if you were going to jail
he said go back to sleep and talk about it in the morning
you’ve made a life out of worrying
you have trouble doing the right things the right way
I’m humbled when a friendship ends
when you’re young everything’s out of reach
then everything falls short
I woke up dreamin’ about the corn at Antietam
then I laid and thought that we haven’t talked in a long time
when I was with you I mostly just felt alright
we just can’t square growing up
now I’m a lost ball in your tall grass
and when clean blood work don’t excite just like it should
this better get fun soon
on 9/11 your mom took you to see Legally Blonde
she covered eyes
and we just want to know that you’re alright
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